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When Slip Mahoney and Horace Debussy "Sach" Jones walk by a Bowery escort bureau that is advertising openings for intelligent, cultured men, they go in to apply for jobs and are promptly thrown out. Undeterred, Slip decides to open his own escort agency, and he and Sach go to the bank where their old friend Gabe Moreno works to see about getting a business loan. While Slip and Sach are being thrown out of the bank, Gabe gets into a waiting car with Joan Marshall, a stunning blonde. Later, Slip and Sach join their pals at the sweet shop, where they find the proprietor, Louie Dumbroski, in a daze. Slip convinces Louie to take a vacation, volunteering to mind the store in his absence, and Louie and his wife Sarah depart for Coney Island. Meanwhile, Gabe is horrified to discover that an envelope containing a bank customer's $5,000 deposit is missing, and he goes to Joan's apartment, where he finds thugs Champ and Samson counting the money. Gabe prepares to go to the police, but Joan and her cohorts threaten to frame him for embezzlement unless Gabe gives them the combination to the bank vault. Later, while Slip and his friends are busy converting the sweet shop into an escort agency, Champ's accomplice, The Professor, produces blueprints and models showing how they can break into the bank by digging a tunnel under the sweet shop. When Slip refuses to rent Louie's store, Champ comes up with another plan to gain access, and that night, Joan and her friends, Verna, Bunny and Tracy, come into Slip's establishment looking for escorts. Slip and the boys accompany the women to Joan's apartment, leaving Sach in charge of the shop. Champ and his men immediately move in, and when they tell Sach that they are government men searching for uranium, he eagerly volunteers to help them dig. Meanwhile, Louie, who has been feeling guilty about leaving his store, insists on returning home for a couple of days. Back in town, the group date comes to an end when the women accidentally end up drinking the drugged cocktails intended for their escorts. Slip and the boys head back to the escort bureau, arriving in time to see Sach emerging from a hole in the floor. Champ pulls out a gun and orders them all to dig, and when Louie arrives, hysterical at finding his sweet shop renamed and remodeled, he too is pressed into service. Meanwhile, a guilt-ridden Gabe goes to the nearby police station and tells his story, adding that he gave the crooks a phony combination. The police summon Gabe's boss, Mr. Jennings, but before they can lock Gabe up, the digging party breaks through the floor, and the criminals are arrested. Louie is about to hit Sach with a rock, but Jennings examines it and discovers that it does indeed contain valuable uranium ore. Later, Louie is hosting a celebration at his store, which has been converted to a uranium mine, when two government men arrive and show Louie the small print in this deed, which states that he does not own the mineral rights. Louie collapses into Sarah's arms, as the doctor reassures her that all Louie needs is a nice vacation.